Tuesday, January 04, 2011

A little yeast

You were running well; who prevented you from obeying the truth? Such persuasion does not come from the one who calls you. A little yeast leavens the whole batch of dough. Galatians 5:7-9

This past year, I have really been thinking a lot about these verses. It has come to mind on more than one occasion and so I have been mediating on what a little yeast can do. In context the yeast is sin and the dough is the body of Christ. Having worked as a baker for a few years, I know this analogy. It is true how yeast works it's way through the whole batch of dough. It doesn't just stay in one part of the dough, but expands, multiplies and goes throughout the whole batch. It begins to bubble and air pockets form and the whole loaf rises. It also begins to smell yeasty, a smell that doesn't go away until you bake the bread.

As I look at my own life, I can see how discipleship/community played a key role in my journey with Christ. As I walked in community with others, specifically as I welcomed discipleship, it allowed others to know me, and to ask me hard questions and it allowed others to speak life to me. It also allowed for the calling of sin in ones life. We need each other. When we decide to do life on our own and refuse discipleship we can begin to stumble and fall and we may begin to bend scripture and believe things to be untrue.

I remember when I began to slip. It was kind of easy. I began reading publications that believed that homosexuality was okay. That the Biblical understanding was translated wrong, that context was wrong, that the word of God was not relevant to today's living. Basically, I began looking for other ideas, other than the word of God to validate my same gender attraction. I slowly began moving away from the faith community and began hanging out with those with a more liberal faith, who said to me “God made you this way”. It validated my feelings and so who was I to believe. It felt good. It was no longer a challenge or a hardship to believe that God made me this way. I allowed the yeast to work it's way into my life. It began to fester and bubble, and it began to smell. I had a different aroma now. An aroma of independence, an aroma of anger, being gay was it and no one was going to tell me different. You could say I was being discipled but instead of Godly discipleship, I was allowing the world and liberal theologians to sway me from the truth of who I really was and who God created me to be.

When I look back, I wish that people would have had the courage and love to talk with me about my decisions. Maybe I was already too hardened to listen but maybe something could have been said to me that would have triggered a repentant heart.
Knowing what I know now, and having walked this journey out. I have come to a place of knowing who God really created me to be, a man created to worship the one true God, created in His image, not created as a mistake, rather one with gifts and qualities that are continually being redeemed and restored by submitting my whole life to God and in the community of others. I recognize that I need others and I need accountability and discipleship.

If I have a friend who I see is beginning to believe lies or is living in a way that may harm himself or others, I love him/her enough to talk with them. A little yeast in my friends life not only affects them but also affects me and those around us. When I allowed the yeast of identifying myself as gay to fester, it affected a lot of people around me. It spread to my family, my friends and my church community. So I love my friends enough to say something. Not in a condemning or self righteous attitude, but rather one with humility and love. I've been there, done that and know the importance of walking with one another in community. It doesn't always feel good, but in the end it is of value and worth to you and those around you.


Tye said...

Appreciate your writing and sharing your thoughts.

Marcy said...

thanks Ken. I needed to hear that message. It's hard to speak to someone when you know they are going to justify their actions as "God's Will". It's hard to refute someone even in love (and I love this person very much) when they excuse it all away with "I believe this is God's will, look at all the things he has put in my path, yada yada..." It's not specific to same gender attraction, but it is a slippery slope I see my loved one falling into. The yeast analogy is very accurate. I wish I could give this loved one the ability to SEE what it is they are slipping into. I guess all we can do is say it like it is with love (and I know they know I love them) and let the Holy Spirit do his job. It's tough though. If I don't speak the truth though, if I hold back, then the question is am I showing them LESS love than if I do say something?

Sarah said...

This good to think about. Often what motivates me on top of my relationship with Jesus is community, the body of Christ and simply come into alignment with truth but recently I have been thinking about how my choices and words spoken effect those around me and more specifically those Jesus may be calling to a deeper and fuller relationship with God and towards a deeper revelation of truth.