so, the journey so far has led us through manitoba, saskatchewan...where we stayed the night at 3 different homes, arriving late yesterday night and then basically going in, finding the bedroom, falling asleep. it was a good journey thus far. we laughed, and laughed, and cried a bit, as we listened to some teaching from the exodus conference. that seems like a month ago, when in reality it was 2 weeks ago. i enjoyed the exodus conference this year, as i served them by being on the prayer time. i found my niche, or my passion. being there, connecting with specific people was amazing and i met some wonderful people who are living life as best as they can in a culture that says they are not valued or that they are denying themselves. how odd it is for those who have chosen the path toward God, laying down their own fleshly desires to actually take up the cross and follow after their king...their savior, their love! the world sees it as foolish, that we are being brainwashed and yet if we look at it from our eyes, we can say the same things...we can say that the world is brainwashing those to enter a lifestyle that often brings unfullfillment. i met a lot of unhappy people, who would claim happiness, yet looking closer, there is so much unhappiness, sex filled with drugs, alcohol, one partner, lover after another, trying to fill that void. trying to find that "right one" that will fill the loneliness, the emptiness, the deep longings. i speak with experience. i too was there, searching to find that thing the someone to fill my insecurities, my hurts, my loneliness. that person to affirm me.
now looking forward, i know the one that truly affirms me, the one who loves me, fills that emptiness, that loneliness, the longings. it is my heavenly king, my father, my all in all. as cheesy as that may sound to some people, it has brought me a sense of stability, a deep knowing that i am loved, and that i am okay. i do not need anyone to complete me, but God has brought someone into my life who will share the load, who will walk with me, who is christ in the flesh. i have many people who have been christ to me, but this one is different, she is my opposite. this week, i get to see God move in her, as she allows him to minister to her, drawing her, wooing her unto himself...for I come second to God, who is her first love...and i am thankful for that. i am thankful that i do not need to lean into her for completion and she need not lean into me, yet we support one another with love and we encourage one another, love one another.
we are in calgary, part of the living waters leadership training conference and this year i am an assistant small group leader and i am looking forward to it. i am reminded of my need for God to be my everything, he is the one who speaks and i hear his voice for his sheep know their masters voice. i pray that this will go deeper, that as i am willing to be his hands, feet, that he will minister to me in ways that he want to. that i will be willing to listen.
well, it is late, and tomorrow will be a long day, a day of newness, challenges all their own, and i focus on tomorrow, tomorrow. i give thanks for today and the brightness of the sky, the breeze that cooled us, and the way God moves in time. he is my lover, the one that ravishes my heart, and i long to dwell in his sanctuary. i am thankful for the blessings he pours out, the gift of love, joy, peace and power.
If i can i will blog a wee bit during the week, but have no idea if there is access there. please pray for strength and humility.
please pray that God will bless financially, as my support is not 100% and paula and i have been praying for a home to purchase, before the prices rise to a place where we will not be able to afford. we cherish you and pray a blessing over you.
